


Trick Or Trick Kids

by TimeCloneMike



Series: Don't Trust The Flower [1]
Category: Undertale
Genre: Gen, Halloween, Vandalism, trick or treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 19:53:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12589344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TimeCloneMike/pseuds/TimeCloneMike
Summary: October 31st, 2016 in Ebott's Wake.





	Trick Or Trick Kids

The oven timer beeped persistently and insistently until a massive finger in white fur reached out and tapped the appropriate button. A proportionately sized paw opened the door and reached inside, pulling out a tray of cookies without bothering with the protection of a glove or mitt, not that many would fit. One by one, cookies were transferred from a hot metal baking dish to a cooling rack, and Toriel smiled as she inhaled the aroma of her homemade baked goods.

Her head turned to see the dozens upon dozens of similar cookies stacked in the kitchen, inside boxes and bowls and other containers.

“Hmmm... I hope that is enough, but I don't know that I have enough time to bake any more-”

The doorbell began to ring insistently, and the teacher sighed. “Speaking of time...”

With a bowl of cookies in her arms, Toriel made her way to the front door and opened it to reveal...

“Trick or Treat!”

“Well, hello there children! Happy Halloween to all of you!”

“You too, Mrs. Dreemurr! Are Frisk and Asriel ready- oof! And Chara,” Douglas appended, rubbing his side where Mary had elbowed him.

“I believe they are nearly ready. In the meantime, perhaps you could indulge an old lady who does not keep up with popular culture, and explain your costumes?”

“Sure!” Mary Metzinger pointed at the fake mustache on her face, then the red hat and matching red shirt underneath her blue overalls. “I am Mario, plumber, doctor, artist, and all around heroic figure.”

“Uhm.” Casey raised a wing, sniffing and wiggling her nose in irritation at her own fake mustache. “I'm Luigi, Mario's younger brother, plumber, paranormal investigator, and eternal second banana.”

“Yo!” Poncho jumped up and down. “I'm Sonic the Hedgehog! Wandering hero constantly fighting the robot minions of the evil Doctor Eggman! Gotta go fast!”

Douglas tapped the modified football helmet on his head that had been spray painted blue. “I am, uh, Mega Man. Robot defender of peace and justice and the recurring enemy of the evil Doctor Wily, who also uses robot minions.”

“Uhm. I. Uh.” Skate began to stall out from nervousness. “I'm, uh. The Vic Viper. A trans-dimensional space fighter designed to protect earth from the Bacterion aliens. Also Easter Island statues for some reason.”

Toriel blinked. “I beg your pardon?”

“It's a Konami game, Mrs. Dreemurr.” Mary shrugged. “Those people are in a world of their own.”

“I see. Well, you are all heroes and defenders of peace and justice, and for that you deserve rewards. Help yourselves to a cookie or two. I think I hear-”

There was a crashing noise as two children got tangled up and tumbled down the last few steps of the staircase, and Toriel spun around to see Frisk and Asriel in a heap on the floor. Asriel held up a gloved paw in a thumbs up gesture.

“We're okay!”

“Yeah. Neither of the games we're dressing up for have fall damage.”

“That's not how it works,” came an electronically filtered voice from above. A figure in an armored suit with large shoulders and one massive cannon for one arm slowly walked down the stairs, stepping around the other two children still trying to untangle their costumes.

“My, that is impressive, Chara. Who are you supposed to be?”

“I'm supposed to be Samus Aran, intergalactic bounty hunter and nemesis of the evil Space Pirates. And you can thank Frisk for the costume's attention to detail.”

Frisk managed to stand up, dusting off their costume.

“You can say the same thing about Chara for mine. Their knitting skills produced the hat and tunic.”

“I see. And who are you this year, Frisk?”

“Link, Hero of Time and Defender of Hyrule, Protector of the Triforce and eternal enemy of Ganondorf, The King Of Thieves.”

“More protectors and heroes, I see. And you, Asriel, what is-”

“I'm Captain Falcon! Racer, bounty hunter, and pilot! FALCON PUNCH!” Asriel jabbed one fist out, which was surrounded in a fireball that resembled a bird.

“True fact, the Large Hadron Collider works by aiming two Falcon Punches against each other,” Frisk pointed out.

Toriel blinked.

“Are you certain of that, my child?”

“It's on the internet. It has to be true.”

“...I see. Well. Regardless of the operating principles of human scientific instruments, the three of you should be back no later than seven. I have pushed back dinner to accommodate trick or treaters but that can only go so far. And if you are accosted by anyone-”

“Wave magic bullets to lock them down, and we run like hell?”

Toriel rolled her eyes at Chara's suggestion. “You are half right. Do you have your cell phones with you?”

“Of course.” Frisk held theirs up. “We need Dimensional Storage to hold more loot.”

“...right. Well. Off you go then, my children. Be safe, and have fun!”

The trio ran out of the house to join the children already standing outside and Mary fit her hands together and popped her knuckles.

“Alright. Time to get this show on the road.

 

“Here you go, kids! Happy Halloween!”

“Thank you!”

“Thanks!”

The team of children dressed as classic video game characters paused at the street corner. Mary adjusted her hat and fake mustache.

“Okay. This block is where things get dicey. Two dentists, one health food nut, and three retirees. And that's just from my notes last year.”

“Yo, you took notes??”

Mary glared at Poncho. “We couldn't have a real Halloween for years because of the Guardians. Even back before Asriel and Chara showed up they were making people nervous. The closest things we had to anything like this were these stupid parties with no decorations, no scares, and sometimes not even candy. Of course I took notes. We can only do this for a few more years before we're considered too old and I'm going to make the most of every single one. Come on.”

Mary charged across the street, leaving the rest of the gang to follow in her wake, and regrouped outside a promising looking house with multiple jack o' lanterns outside.

“Alright. Here we go.” Mary reached up and pressed the doorbell, and a few moments later, the door opened to reveal a woman dressed like a pirate.

“ _Trick or treat!”_

“Arrrrr! Classic video game heroes! I think. Hold on a second, I got some loot bags for everybody. Makes perfect sense.” The woman vanished, then returned with several small plastic bags, handing them out to each child. “Happy Halloween, you kids! Stay safe out there!”

“ _Thank you!”_

Back on the sidewalk running down the block, Mary shook her head. “Better open these up, see what we have to work with... hmmm. Those chocolate coins wrapped in yellow foil to look like gold coins, candy necklace... and a lime??”

“Probably for scurvy, vitamin C and stuff.” Frisk shrugged. “Fits with the whole pirate theme.”

“Ah. That makes sense.”

“Hey, if anybody doesn't want their fruit, I'll trade,” Casey spoke up. “Apples, oranges, limes, lemons, cherries, whatever.”

“May take you up on that later,” Chara spoke up.

“Decent stuff, nice theme going on. I like this place. Five stars. But the night's still young.” Mary pointed to the adjacent house, with a giant spider decoration affixed to the side of the building. “Onward, team!”

The process repeated itself with Mary pressing the doorbell, but the figure that answer was a man dressed in a dark suit with sunglasses.

“Trick or treat!”

“Your presence here has been noted. For the sake of national security I have been authorized to grant you confections.” The man reached inside a conveniently located bucket and began handing out candy bars. “Remember, this exchange never happened.”

“That was... a little strange,” Asriel commented once the group was back on the sidewalk again. “But these are full sized candy bars, so I guess that's okay.”

“Yes.” Chara nodded. “There's nothing fun about fun sized candy bars. Fun is directly proportionate to candy. Less candy is less fun.”

“That math checks out.” Frisk pointed at the next house. “Hey, are we stopping at the place with the scarecrow on the front porch swing?”

“Yeah. That's the Cobb's house. They're hit and miss on the good stuff but worth a shot.”

“Okay. It's just. That scarecrow is a person.”

“You mean, like, a monster hanging out?”

“No, like, a human wearing a costume to scare trick or treaters.” Frisk's eyes glowed purple. “Guys, back me up on this.”

A purple light began to shine from behind the visor of Chara's helmet, and Skate's cockpit.

“Frisk is right, I can see the heartbeat. Do we still go for it? Forewarned is forearmed?”

Mary tapped her chin, frowning.

“...yes. Follow my lead.”

The gang trudged down the sidewalk until they neared the porch. Mary breathed in and out slowly, then sprinted up the sidewalk to the porch, jumping just as the straw covered figure got up with a roar.

“GRAAAAA-”

“LET'S A-GO!”

Mary bounced off the scarecrow, causing it to recoil and collapsed back into the swing with a surprised “oof!” noise. Mary wobbled on the landing but managed to stay on her feet as the kids sprinted up to join her.

“Ow, what the hell?!”

“Sorry Mister Cobb. It was just too obvious.”

“...guess the other kids warned you. Man, smartphones have ruined Halloween for pranksters.” The scarecrow produced a five gallon bucket from somewhere and started handing out candy. “Still. Fair's fair.”

“Actually we didn't know for sure. It was an educated guess.”

“Alright. Welp, try to keep it under your hat. Happy Halloween.”

“We will Mr. Cobb. You too.”

The children proceeded onward, Casey munching noisily on a small orange. Mary held up a hand to stop the procession, staring at the house with only a few decorations, most of them in the windows.

“Okay, this is a blank spot. The people that used to live here moved over to the other side of town. I have no idea who's here now. It's worth a shot but be ready. We might only get candy corn out of this one.”

The children progressed down the sidewalk to the house, and Mary pressed the doorbell. The door swung open a few seconds later to reveal a woman without a costume but holding a box.

“Trick or Treat!”

“Ah, trick or treaters. That brings back memories. Hold on, I have some goodie bags for each one of you!” The woman began to pass out small brown paper sacks. “Here you go! Stay safe out there tonight!”

“We will ma'am!” Mary called out as the door shut. The gang retreated back to the sidewalk near the street and Mary pulled open the sack she had been handed. “Mind the staples, guys. And inside, we have...”

Mary stopped talking, and Casey reached out to tap her shoulder with a wingtip.

“Mary? What is it? Candy corn?”

“...worse.”

“Tootsie Rolls?”

“Worse.” Mary upended the bag into her hand, to reveal a handful of peanuts, and what looked like a folded dollar bill.

“Yo, she gave us money?!”

“No.” Mary grabbed the dollar bill and unfolded it, to reveal tiny text on the inside. “It's a little note about religious stuff and Jesus and so on and so forth.”

“...aw. And for a moment I was all excited.”

“Yeah. That's basically the state of organized religion in America today, according to my dad,” Mary nodded. “It seems good on the outside, and then you join up and too late you realize everyone's been lying to you.”

“That's a little harsh, but I agree that false advertising is a bad way to spread your message,” Frisk commented.

The gang jumped as there was a popping noise from behind them, and turned to see the crushed remains of a paper bag in Chara's gauntlet.

“ _No chocolate.”_

“...Chara? Are you okay?”

Douglas stepped back sharply as the armored figure turned to face him.

“You know how you guys didn't get to trick or treat? You had those lousy parties? Well. I didn't even have that. And then somebody has the audacity to hand out these little lying recruitment pamphlets all in the name of saving souls when they probably don't have the slightest idea of how Souls actually work.”

“...is that a no? I can't really tell.”

“...I vote we trash this place.” Chara held up their arm cannon. “Anybody else?”

“Any time spent vandalizing this house is time not spent getting candy from other houses,” Frisk pointed out. “I'm not saying we shouldn't. I'm just pointing that out.”

Mary looked around at the rest of the group before nodding slowly.

“...alright. I think we are all in agreement. This cannot stand. We came looking for treats, and we got tricked.” Mary slammed a fist into her open hand. “Now we trick back.”

There was a flash of blue light, and Frisk began to toss a roll of toilet paper up in the air and catching it again.

“Chara, you ready?”

“Yes.” The arm cannon on the child's armor suit popped open. The toilet paper roll was slotted into place, and Chara took aim. Beside them, Asriel raised both paws until a hand closed over one.

“No property damage please.” Frisk nodded towards the lawn right in front of the front door. “A giant pumpkin with a creepy face would be just about perfect though.”

Asriel blinked, then grinned and nodded. On Frisk's other side, Douglas, Skate, and Mary had produced an assortment of rotten fruit, eggs, soap, and other tools of the trick-or-treater's trade.

“Alright guys... nobody messes with Halloween in Ebott's Wake and gets away with it.” Mary grinned. “On your mark, get set... get _spooky_.”

With a thunking noise, toilet paper spiraled out of the improvised arm cannon, arcing over the house... and in mere moments, all was chaos.


End file.
